Hash # 1153
When: Monday 19 May; 7pm
Where: Millburn train station
Hare: Wrangler
Hashers: Some people showed up, some people didn't
TRAIL
Sucked
CIRCLE:
Some down-downs were given out
On On:
OK enough, I guess.
On Out:
Dog E
Did I leave anything out?
*************************************
Sorry, the scribe took the notes, he might as well type them up and send ‘em out:
Voilà…
Summit Hash 1153 and Full Moon 95
Wrangler's BD & Hashing with SH3 Analversary Trivia Hash
Where: Millburn Train Station; Lackawanna Place Parking Lot
Weather: 60° with rapidly gathering darkness (Perfect for hashing)
When: Monday 19 May; 7pm
Hare: Rear End Wrangler
Hashers: (20) Breaststroke, Camel Bowels, Comfy Hole, DogE Style, Dogmeat, GI, HazMatt, Just Eric, Just George, Just Murray, Keyhole, LocoMorrow, Loogy, Massengil,
Miscast, Rat Bastard, Seoul Brudda, Street Lane, Suck ‘em Up, and Twatever.
As a birthday surprise, the Full Moon trail master, gave Wrangler the honor and privilege of setting the May full moon hash as well. This present was unwrapped in an email the previous day.
Subject: The NEXT Summit Full Moon Hash!!!
Date: Sunday, May 18, 2008 9:29:14 PM
Finally, just when you thought the SFMHHH Trail Master was out to lunch:
Run # 95
Where: Millburn Train Station
When: 7:15pm SHARP (Monday 19 May)
Hare: Just Frank
Good Trail, Good Beer, Good Times.
Given that responsibility, and with less than 24 hours to prepare, Wrangler knew he had to set a trail that met the high standards set forth by the Full Moon hash.
The pack had been forewarned to bring a flashlight, or in the European vernacular, a torch. Such and implement proved critical to the success of the hash.
At the appointed hour, the hare gave his chalk talk, or in this case Sheetrock talk. (This construction material, proved itself a worthy as a means of setting trail) “Because up to 17% of drywall is wasted during the manufacturing and installation processes and the drywall material is rarely re-used, disposal has become a problem” –until now. The hare gave the material a big thumbs up, indicating that he would use this technique when he travels to Amsterd*m next week to be the hare. Hares everywhere should consider the benefits of Drywall, gypsum board, wallboard, and/or plasterboard for their trail setting needs. It is clean and easy to use and a little goes a long way. The marks are well seen and stay in the rain.
TRAIL
The format of this hash was one successfully employed by previous hares in Westfield and Millburn –the trivia check, wherein the checks were accompanied by a question posted on a nearby telephone pole. See appendix A for a complete listing of questions and correct responses. The possible answers were accompanied by an arrow indicating a possible route, a correct response indicated true trail.
One of the questions involved a calculation, to calculate the hare’s age in dog years. It wasn’t as simple as 45/7, it involved more complex solving scenario. After all these years, Keyhole is catching on about the purpose of a check: He insinuated that without the checks the “run could have been a lot shorter” No shit, Sherlock.
Suck ‘em Up’s “Law of Dog” : for D>2; H(yr) = 10.5*2+4*(D-2) –[Ed. note really the last thingy should be (H-2) but let us not get into an algebra discussion. …Please…] “Monday’s night run could have been a lot shorter if we had been given the rule at the mis-directions chalk talk.” –Keyhole
The Scribe estimates the trail probably looked something like this, except for the parts that were underground:
There may have been water fountains on trail, but MapMyRun doesn't have an icon for Beer check.
TRAIL
After going past the firehouse, and back along the trail tracks a NJ transit train was so interested in the trail that the engineer stopped the train as the hashers pondered the next question near the rail line.
The front-runners became back-runners and the pack winded its way through the streets and tunnels of Millburn.
Les Misérables is set in the Parisian underworld. Jean Valjean would have loved the portion of the trail that has become hash legend. The tunnel still held the rope set there some 10 years ago by Paul Bunion, however the hare took pity on the pack and installed a new sturdy nylon rope, with loops for handholds. That proved essential where the tunnel took a steep decline in its course. Those in the know, were thoroughly amused that those new to this venue tried to step on the sides of the tube, hoping to keep their feet dry. That awkward gait was aborted when the water got deeper and the sides got further away. Wet shoes were had by all.
The scene could also evoke the Dwarfs emerging from their jewel mine:
There might have been some “Heigh-Ho, Heigh-Ho”s, but the scribe missed that performance.
Ok, enough about that damn tunnel
The format of the hash, and the intentional slow-down though the above mention structure meant that there was no glory for the fleetest. The pack was packed in close proximity for the duration.
After the pack regrouped and headed out, into the dusk, past the high school girls lacrosse practice, it was pretty soon thereafter that the C-E split was posted.
The entirety of the pack was reunited at the beer check. Those on the chicken route arrived about a beer ahead of the eagles. As noted above, and to the credit of the hare’s devious format, the flock of eagles all descended on the beer within a few minutes of each other.
ON-ON
La Strada Restaurante in Millburn.
The venue was familiar to one and all, or at least all who have attended any of the previous President’s Cup 5K Races: http://sneakerfactory.com/pres08.pdf
The Circle was opened by the Summit HHH grandmaster, Rat Bastard at 9:00.
He quickly ceded control to the Full Moon RA, Dogmeat
Even though the hash was inside LaStrada, the circle was a full-throated R-Rated version. (There was no one else in the joint).
FRB: Keyhole
DFL: Loco
Non-runner: Street Lane.
Virgin: Just George, who was brought there by Comfy Hole
Birthday boy: Wrangler who is turning 540 months old.
Slipped out the side door before he could be recognized: Just Eric “I found the toilet paper” Liang.
Reboots: Street Lane, last seen on Whomp em's back deck at the Ides of March Hash, and Just Murray, who ran the hash with a backpack filled with his work clothes. (He didn’t trust anyone at the start to hold it in his car). He apparently rode his bicycle to work, and then joined the hash after changing from his work attire.
Accusations observations
· Massengil accused Camel of ogling the field hockey players. That backfired when another observant hasher accused Massengil of not knowing field hockey from lacrosse. Massengil claimed Camel blurted, “There too old, I mean, I mean not old enough for me”.
· Camel and Just Murray were called up for speaking with too much enthusiasm about their endurance, including how to cum up long hills.
· The monks of St Bernard arrived at 9:10 but Dogmeat persevered.
· Suck ‘em Up was noted to be sporting a piece of apparel that resembled ankle weights. “They’re gaiters!” Whatever.
· Breaststroke was heard by many to brag at the beer check, “I did the eagle trail”
· Camel was stood up as a nearly departed. With each day, his days in NJ are numbered, the number was in the 30’s.
· GI was called up for inadvertently stepping on a dirty American flag. Although he denied the desecration, he was joined by the newly Americanized Camel and newly green-carded Rat.
· As another foreigner, Just George was called forth; his foreign connection is that he lives in Brooklyn. Loogy, laying low in the corner of the bar, was noted to be wearing a marathon shirt.
· DogE was called up for having a raspy voice, “like Lauren Bacall”. This was a remnant of his over stressed voice from the Co-Motion by the Ocean, which wrapped up the day before.
· Just George seems to be catching on. He observed no boobs at the boob check, much to his chagrin.
o To which Suck ‘em Up retorted, “These are breasts, you’re a boob”. Ouch!
Noming:
As the circle was concluding, Twatever got up with something in her hands. She also had Just Matt rise for the occasion. Twat asked Matt to say what he said at the Towaco Train station at a recent hash. He told her “He could only stay for an hour”. And at a subsequent hash, he told the pack that he could only be there for two hours. Each time true to his word, he disappeared at the as the hour drew to a close. For that, Just Matt will be forever known in the hash as “HOURLY RATE”. Twat was also quick to claim that this was Anal’s last gesture as out-going GM. He made his noming from his undisclosed exile island.
The circle concluded at 9:24, not bad for a Dogmeat led affair.
Wrangler then tried to rustle up more hares on behalf of Great Sex.
Hash cash was a mere 5 bucks -thanks to an underwriting grant from the hare.
DogE handed his cash to Massengil, who tried to take advantage of the situation. Massengil told Wrangler that it was his cash, knowing Dog E couldn’t call out to contradict that.
Up coming event:
President’s Cup R’ce
DISTANCE: 5,000 METERS | MONDAY JUNE 16TH, 2008 | 8:00 PM
Hash cash $22 if in by June 11
Application: http://sneakerfactory.com/pres08.pdf
On-Out,
Dog E Style
Scribe/On-Sec
DES/mmi
Appendix A:
In the Chinese calendar, 1963 was the year of the:
a. Rat
b. Dog
c. Hare
d. Cock
Wrangler is how old in dog years:
a. 7
b. 8
c. 9
d. 10
If Wrangler was a dog, how many human years would he now be?
http://www.onlineconversion.com/dogyears.htm
a. 8
b. 145
c. 193
d. 200
1963 in Roman numerals is:
a. MMVIII
b. MCMLXIII
c. MCMXCIII
d. OIEIO
Who is # 1?
a. RE Wrangler
b. RE Wrangler
c. RE Wrangler
d. All the above
None of the above was not an option.
Who does not share the same Birthday as Wrangler?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/May_21
a. Mr. T – Actor Laurence Tureaud; May 21, 1952)
b. Al Franken – Comedian Alan Stuart Franken (born May 21, 1951)
c. Barbi Benton – Playboy model (born 28 January 1950)
d. Jeffrey Dahmer – Serial killer (May 21, 1960 – November 28, 1994)
Ya gotta admit the resemblance is pretty striking.
This is a back check – go back to the last check and guess again!
7 years ago on June 4th, who was the hare at Wrangler’s first SH3 hash?
a. Finger-In
b. Alibi
c. Dogmeat
d. Papoose
The average garden snail moves at around 0.03 mph, just a little faster pace than a typical SH3 DFL. If it set out on your last birthday and moved non-stop for one year, it would have traveled:
a. 849 yards
b. 26.2 miles
c. 263 miles
d. 1018 miles
This is a “BOOB” check – Wait for 1st harrierette!
The Sultan of Brunei hosted the world’s most expensive birthday party to celebrate his 50th BD. The cost was US$ 27.2 million. Hash cash at Wrangler’s BD will be only $10 per person. The on-on will be at:
a. The Manor
b. Taco Bell parking lot
c. Clitty Litter’s house
d. LaStrada (355 Millburn Ave)
No comments:
Post a Comment